Berry's World
Saturday, October 11, 2003

Well, if you call one candidate a swarm, I guess the headline is true. Lorraine (Abner Zurd) Fontanes, who I mentioned in this post, stopped by Berry's World and commented:

Hey, nobody takes their clothes off in my movies. Sorry to disappoint you but they're satirical, dude!

All the best,
Lorraine (Abner Zurd) Fontanes

However, back in reality, I never said, or even implied, that anybody took their clothes off in Fontanes' movies. I merely said that anybody who voted for her was an absolute idiot.

In the past, I guess I have been tough on Lindsey McKinney, who is a former roommate of Kobe Bryant's accuser. I said that McKinney "had the loyalty of your garden-variety personal injury attorney". And I said that "with ‘friends’ like McKinney, who needs enemies?"

It turns out I was wrong.

I was being entirely too kind to McKinney.

Check out this passage from The Rocky Mountain News story on Kobe's preliminary hearing:

Bryant did gain a fan Thursday - Lindsey McKinney, who once lived with the alleged victim and has been quoted in many media reports. She decorated her black sports car with pro-Bryant statements including: "Kobe we (heart) u!" across the windshield.

"This may be adding to the media circus, but I don't care," said the 18-year-old McKinney. "It's going to be crazy anyway."

That's right. The woman who 'regretted' talking to the press, shows up supporting the man who allegedly raped her former friend and ex-roommate. Of course, this is not the first time McKinney had pro-Kobe slogans written on her car. See this passage from an LA Times story (linked through KTLA) in July:

Janelle Medina, 19, who sang in a choir with the woman throughout high school, pulls into the Texaco with the windows of her compact car decorated with white shoe polish: "Kobe Is Innocent. Go Lakers! No. 8! Yeah, Baabbee!"

Friends gather around her car and nod in agreement. Medina and two boys scribble the same pro-Bryant slogans on the car of friend Lindsey McKinney, and everyone laughs.

But moments after Medina drives away, McKinney grabs a squeegee from a gas pump and wipes off the words.

"I definitely don't think she was out to get anyone," McKinney says. "Right now, it's impossible to know what happened in that room."

Sadly, this really doesn't tell us much about McKinney, as anybody who has followed her in the press knows what sort of slime she oozes wherever she goes. But, I wonder, at what point in time did McKinney's parents realize that they absolutely and utterly failed in their duty to raise a decent child?

Take a look at the current headlines at BuzzFlash:

Limbaugh the Liar: "And I think it had nothing to do with physical characteristics. There's nothing wrong with me," He Said About His Golf Game. No Back Problem There, Just a Drug Addict Using Illegal Pills Problem. 10/12

Must Listen: Rush Limbaugh Was's Hypocrite of the Week After His ESPN Comment and the National Enquirer Exposed Him as a Junky. Hypocrite of the Week, Exclusively on Take Back the Media.Com. 10/11

Rush Limbaugh is Quite the Golfer for a Man with a Disabling Back Injury, As He Claims 10/12

Will Rush's Hard Line Haunt Him? No Hypocritical, Sinning, Lying GOP "Christian" White Males are Always Forgiven by Hypocritical, Lying, Sinning GOP "Christian" White Males. That's Easy to Understand, Isn't It? 10/12

Limbaugh Discusses Drugs: “And so if people are violating the law by doing drugs, they ought to be accused and they ought to be convicted and they ought to be sent up.” 10/11

Limbaugh Announces Guest Host While He is In Rehab (Satire) 10/11

Double Standard Alert for White Male Bush Propaganda Shills: "Premiere spokesman Michael Sitrick said Limbaugh is expected to return to his program after completing treatment. Several guest hosts were scheduled until then." A Black Man Would Go to Jail.

This is What Rush Limbaugh Thinks About People Who use Drugs: And What the Faux President Thinks About the Demagogue Drug Addicted Populist - A BuzzFlash News Analysis

Rush is Quite the Golfer With All That Back Pain 10/12

Source Confirms Limbaugh Investigation 10/12

Phony Gucci Shoed Populist Rush "Pigboy" Limbaugh Admits He's a Junkie, Which Means, According to Bush, He Must be Aiding Terrorists. The Grand GOP Hypocrite of the Airwaves is Nothing More Than a Hypocritical Drug Addict.

It's a good thing that the people at BuzzFlash are perfect, right?

OK, I'll admit it. I'm a soccer fan. I love the World Cup, and I like to watch my home town LA Galaxy when they are on the tube.

So flash back to Kansas City, about 25 minutes ago. The Galaxy are in overtime against the Kansas City Wizards in the last game of the season. The game will help determine the playoff seeds for both teams. After a foul, the Wizards, while clearly offsides, score a goal.

I say they were offsides mainly because the referee who decides if a team is offsides held up his flag indicating the player who scored the alleged goal was, indeed, offsides. Therefore, no goal and the game goes on.

A player from Kansas City (I can't name more than two players on the Galaxy so don't hold your breath looking for me to know a Wizards player's name) became so enraged that he shoves a referee. He is immediately given a yellow card meaning he was thrown out of the game.

Then, and this is like two minutes after the non-goal was put in, the referee CHANGES HIS MIND and decides that there was no offsides and the goal counts!

Talk about your home cooking!

If this were baseball, or the NFL, this would be a huge story and talked about for weeks. But, because it's soccer, this is more than likely the only place you'll hear about it.

Dear Mr. President,

I am writing to offer you my services. I would like to help you in the 'War Against Terror' by serving on the President's Foreign Intelligence Advisory Board. Now, I know what your saying; "Why would I want some tinhorn weblogger as a member of 'Piffy-ab'?," which, as you know, is what the advisory board is known as in intelligence circles.

Well, there are several reasons. First of all, I'm a team player. Quite frankly, and I mean no disrespect Mr. President, you could use a few more team players on your staff. Right now, you have two wars on your hands; the war in Iraq, and the slightly more bloody war between the State Department and the Department of Defense. Things have gotten so bad that Colin Powell has even threatened to ‘take hostages' in his battle with Don Rumsfeld.

Rumsfeld is also involved in a heated brouhaha with Condoleezza Rice over who gets to be in charge of the Iraq Stabilization Group. It seems like Rumsfeld, who now is fighting an interdepartmental battle on two fronts, appears ready to snap. He recently berated a reporter with "I said I don't know. Isn't that clear? You don't understand English?" The funny thing is that the reporter was German, and he may not actually understand English.

You also have this Ahmed Chalabi, who is a member of the Iraqi Governing Council, running around trying to stab you in the back by cutting a deal with the French and the Germans. Leaving aside the idea that only an American should be allowed to stab the President in the back, you really don’t need Chalabi working from his own agenda. By the way, did you see him on Frontline the other night? He just looks sneaky, doesn't he?

Now, Mr. President, you are also catching flak because some bonehead in your administration thought it would be funny to disclose the identity of a CIA operative. I don’t know who would pull this kind of sick prank but, between you and me, it sounds like the work of John Ashcroft. He’s always pulling stupid practical jokes. Remember when he went over to The National Archives and started crossing out sections of The Constitution with a black Sharpee? Ok, that was kind of funny, but most of his gags fall flat.

My point is that I would never disclose the identity of a CIA operative (unless you wanted me to). In fact, unlike Karl Rove and Scooter Libby, I have signed, under penalty of perjury, an affidavit swearing that I didn’t disclose Valerie Plame's identity, so I have a proven track record of not leaking.

Some will advise you, Mr. President, that you would be out of your mind to name me to 'Piffy-ab' as I have no intelligence experience. I am quite certain that this sort of ‘small picture’ thinking won’t sway you. You had the gumption and foresight to name William O. DeWitt Jr to the board, and considering that he and I have the same exact amount of intelligence experience, this should not be a deal breaker. In fact, we could play up the fact that I am an outsider, and have no experience, and am clearly unqualified for the position. I mean, it worked during your campaign in 2000, right?

Another plus in naming me to 'Piffy-ab' is my independence. DeWitt is catching heat from some negative back-benchers because he is one of your biggest contributors. Well, I’m on record as saying that I would rather have an epileptic dentist on a heroin bender give me a double root canal than donate money to your campaign, so my independence is a given.

So, Mr. President, I am at your disposal. I am ready, willing, and able to serve. Please e-mail me at the address in the upper right hand corner, or just post something in the comments, and we can get this wagon trail moving.



Kobe Bryant is a goner. He's going to be doing federal time. He's going to have a cellmate named 'Mother' and have to fight off the advances of an imprisoned malcontent who wants nothing better than to make Kobe his bitch.

That is if you believe Michael Ventre who is a

Ventre penned a story for MSNBC that carried the headline 'What Were They Thinking?' The 'they' in the headline is Kobe's attorneys, Pamela Mackey and Hal Haddon, and Ventre is confounded by their 'surprising' decision to go through with a preliminary hearing in the rape case against Bryant. This is an amazing condemnation of Mackey and Haddon when you consider that the preliminary hearing has not been completed.

Sadly, Ventre buries the most important piece of information in the 15th paragraph of the story:

Speaking not as a legal expert but solely as a citizen who might be called to jury duty someday, I can only conclude that Mackey and Haddon have lost their minds.

Oh, maybe I jumped the gun there. Because from reading the first 14 paragraphs, one could easily have made the mistake of thinking the story had been written by Gerry Spence or Barry Scheck.

Did Kobe's attorneys make a mistake in going through with the preliminary hearing? I have no idea. But then again, neither does Gerry Spence, or Barry Scheck, or especially Michael Ventre. The only people that can have an informed opinion on that question are the people that made that decision, because only they have seen all the evidence available to them.

Ventre proves time and again that he really has no idea what he's talking about. He points out that 'one creep has already been arrested and jailed for conspiring to murder her.'

Actually, Mike, conspiracy is, basically, when two or more people agree to commit a crime. You're one person short of a conspiracy charge here. Of course, Ventre could have looked up the word conspiracy, or checked to see what the creep was actually charged with (one count of solicitation of murder and one count of solicitation to dissuade a witness) but that might have slowed him down in the rush to publish his legal criticism.

I pointed out the other day that a lot of people live under the misapprehension that anyone can be a politician or an attorney. I guess I forgot to point out that when an unqualified person actually starts trying to act like a politician or attorney, he or she usually make an ass out of themselves. My bad, Mike, I didn't warn you.

Hopefully, in the future, Ventre will stick to what he knows, like giving career advice to Michael Jackson, or marriage advice to Ben and J-Lo. But do us and yourself a favor, Michael; leave the legal stuff to legal experts.
Friday, October 10, 2003

As soon as the campaign is over I will— I can get into all of the specifics and find out what is really going on. But right now I’m just really occupied with the campaign.

Governor-Elect Schwarzenegger to Tom Brokaw

Here's Bill Safire on tonight's Newshour on PBS:

Big interesting thing is the Hispanic vote. The Republicans got over 42 percent of the Spanish, the Hispanic vote against a Hispanic who was running. Now that augers very well for Republicans all over.

It might be me, but I think the Republicans would be wise not to start counting their Hispanic chickens for the 2004 race. The reason is that Schwarzenegger is not your father's Republican. If you consider what we know about Arnold's stand on the issues, he easily could have run as an Independent, and it's not ridiculous to think that he could have run as a Democrat.

If the Republicans convince themselves they are now players in the fight for Hispanic voters, they may be mighty disappointed come November, 2004.

I read The Daily Howler every day. Sometimes I laugh, sometimes I get mad, and sometimes I throw my hands up in disgust. Up until today, I've never been scared by something I've read. What caused this fear in my heart? This passage:

Note the cranky tone of this piece? We’re totally sick of our cranky tone too! For that reason, we’re planning to take a significant break, from which we may not even return! (To quote Arnold Schwarzenegger: “Yes, it’s true…”)

I can only hope that this is a joke that I don't get, and The Howler is only taking a brief vacation.

Well, Rush Limbaugh announced today that he is addicted to painkillers. And while I know that this admission will probably cause me to be asked to turn in my membership card to the Democratic party, I'll make it anyway:

I feel sorry for him.

I have sympathy for anybody who becomes addicted to drugs. I've had friends who became addicted to drugs and saw their lives ruined, and I don't wish that on anybody. Not even Rush Limbaugh.

I know, I know. Limbaugh has been a hawk in the war on drugs, and has made numerous statements that indicates his intolerance for drugs, and the people who use them. That makes him a hypocrite. However, that doesn't mean I have to stoop to his level. Yesterday I had sympathy for drug addicts, and tomorrow I will have sympathy for drug addicts, so it would be hypocritical for me to blast Limbaugh for being addicted to drugs today.

So, pillory me all you want. But my conscience is clear, my principals are intact and I'll sleep well tonight.
Thursday, October 09, 2003

Can you believe the nerve of Senator John Kerry?

In tonight's Democratic debate, he attacked General Wesley Clark because Clark, while claiming to be against the war in Iraq, “did say he would vote for the resolution”.

Maybe Senator Kerry forgot that rather than just saying it, he ACTUALLY VOTED FOR THE WAR.

Is it possible that Governor-Elect Schwarzenegger's honeymoon is over before he even takes the oath of office?

I was driving home today and listened to a little bit of The Larry Elder Show, and heard several REPUBLICANS complaining about who Schwarzenegger named to his transition team. It seems like the most offending appointments are San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown, and Los Angeles Mayor Jim Hahn.

One caller, who was just mad as a hatter, complained that Schwarzenegger was The Accommodator and not The Terminator.

To paraphrase former Vice President John Hoynes, "Welcome to the NFL, Arnold."

Andy Sullivan and Tom Bevan are partying like its 1929!

Why? Because new applications for jobless benefits fell by 23,000, keeping the unemployment rate steady at 6.1%. Woo Hoo!!

It really makes you wonder how far some will go to put a good spin on a bad economy. Thankfully, we don't have to wonder for long, as Bevan points us to a column by Robert Robb who celebrates that George W. Bush's economy is not as bad as it was in 1975!

Today's Fresh Air on NPR was a laugh riot, and if you have 40 minutes, it's well worth a listen. Bill O'Reilly went head to head with noted thug Terry Gross, and he didn't fair well, although he did say farewell when he walked out on the interview. O'Reilly played his greatest hits. He complained about Al Franken at length, and he began several sentences with "Hey, the people who are trying to destroy me..."

In a final irony, O'Reilly walked out on Gross because she was trying to read part a review of O'Reilly's new book Who's Looking Out For You? In the paragraph Gross finally read after O'Reilly terminated the interview, the author points out that after giving O'Reilly's previous book a poor review, O'Reilly hammered him in his ridiculous 'The Most Ridiculous Item Of The Day'. Gross was attempting to make a valid point, that by nailing reviewers on his show O'Reilly could be attempting to discourage bad reviews.

Apparently the irony was lost on O'Reilly. He was previewing The O'Reilly Factor yesterday and said:

"Then, why did National Public Radio's Terry Gross ambush O'Reilly? Wait until you hear what happened!"

You would think that somebody with an ego the size of New Hampshire, and who gets attacked quite often would have thicker skin.

And you'd be wrong.

This just boggles the mind. The FBI has admitted to bugging the office of Philadelphia's mayor John F. Street.

The FBI claims the bugs were not related to Street's tight re-election campaign, but refused to say whether Street is under investigation.
Wednesday, October 08, 2003

Other than Gray Davis, who was the big loser in yesterdays recall election? The easy guess is Cruz Bustamante, and the easy guess is dead right.

According to various exit polls (here and here), Bustamante brought in 52% of the Hispanic vote. To make matters worse, 54% of Hispanics voted against the recall.

When you consider that for the rest of Governor Schwarzenegger's term, he will basically be California's version of The Maytag Repairman, Bustamante won't have much to run on after he leaves the Lieutenant Governor's office.

Prediction: Cruz Bustamante will NEVER win another statewide election.

For the third consecutive Wednesday night, The West Wing has been an utter disappointment. Actually, tonights episode, Jefferson Lives, may have been the most tedious episode in The West Wing's history.

So, what's the problem?

It's gotta be the writing. In the past, there was always at least one or two scenes an episode that were just riviting. So far, I can't think of one memorable scene this season. Overall, the show is still enjoyable compared to most of the network TV offerrings, but it has clearly slipped several notches from when it was the best show on television.

By the way, what in the hell is up with the shoe fetish? We must have seen 14 shoes and 2 naked feet in tonights show.

I was shocked to read Elton John’s comments the other day concerning America’s popularity, or lack thereof.

"Americans are always asking why the rest of the world hates them," said Elton. "Well, the reason is Dennis Miller."

Well, I found that to be a little surprising, and somewhat unbelievable, as I figured there were a lot of better reasons to hate us. So, I decided to give the rest of the world a call to see if they really did hate us because of Miller.

REST OF THE WORLD: Hey, Keith, how you doing?

ME: Hey World, long time no hear. Hey, I called you on Monday, what took you so long to call back?

REST OF THE WORLD: Oh, sorry. I guess I should have just forgot about the war in Iraq, the people dying in Afghanistan, the food shortage in Africa, the looming oil crisis, and the fact that in 10 years I won’t have enough water to drink just so I could call you back. My bad,

ME: Hey now, there’s no need to get snippy. I don’t remember you getting all huffy when you called me wanting Super Bowl tickets.

REST OF THE WORLD: Oh, you’re right. I’m sorry, it’s just that I have a lot on my plate these days.

ME: Forget about it. Hey, I wanted to ask you something. I was talking to Elton John the other day…

REST OF THE WORLD: How is Elton? You know I was the one who got him and Bernie Taupin back together.

ME: Dude, that was like 20 years ago. How long are you gonna milk that one?

REST OF THE WORLD: Oh please, like you don’t rub World Wars one and two in my face? So, whatta you want? I’m really busy.

ME: Well, I was wondering why you hate America. Elton said it was…

REST OF THE WORLD: Dennis Miller.

ME: What?

REST OF THE WORLD: Dennis Miller. I hate America because of Dennis Miller.

ME: Wow, that’s what Elton said. I thought it was because of George W. Bush.

REST OF THE WORLD: Nah. We knew Bush was an idiot before he became your president. You don’t get mad at a snake for being a snake.

ME: Huh, so the reason you hate us really is Miller.

REST OF THE WORLD: Yeah, Miller has just become a real asshole. I mean, how the hell can a guy in his 30’s and 40’s go from supporting Jerry Brown to Ross Perot to George W. Bush? I suppose in 2008 Miller was all set to co-chair Idi Amin’s campaign.

ME: He has taken a pretty hard right turn, you’re right about that one.

REST OF THE WORLD: Hey, don’t get me wrong, Miller and I used to be pretty tight. I watched his syndicated show on Fox all the time. And he was the only reason I used to watch Saturday Night Live. He was a riot back then.

ME: So, what happened between you two?

REST OF THE WORLD: Well, he stopped being funny and became flat out mean-spirited. For some reason, when Bill got that…

ME: You mean President Clinton?

REST OF THE WORLD: Yeah, but he lets me call him Bill.

ME: You gotta love the Big Dog.

REST OF THE WORLD: Oh yeah, he’s the best. But when Bill got that hummer from Lewinksi, well Miller blamed every problem on the planet on him, and just couldn’t get over it.

ME: Yeah, he took that pretty hard! Get it? Took it hard?

REST OF THE WORLD: Yeah, good one. How long you been working on that one?

ME: A couple of months. I’ve been looking for the right place to work it in to a conversation.

REST OF THE WORLD: Anyway, after Miller started hating Bill, his humor went into the dumper. I watched his show and I wanted to laugh. I didn’t want some political diatribe from a guy whose next political science class will be his first.

ME: Yeah, I agree. He does hold a grudge against President Clinton.

REST OF THE WORLD: Yeah, but then it got even worse. He practically ruined Monday Night Football. I couldn’t believe how bad he was. I’m sitting there watching the Rams play the Giants when Kurt Warner throws a 51 yard touchdown pass, and Miller is making some reference comparing 17th century poet Andrew Marvell to Elizabeth Cady Stanton, who helped women get the vote. Even Al Michaels told him he was an asshole.

ME: I never heard Michaels call Miller an asshole.

REST OF THE WORLD: I get the live network feed, so I can see what goes on during commercials.

ME: Wow, Michaels really called Miller an asshole. That’s amazing.

REST OF THE WORLD: Oh, that’s nothing. Once, Dan Fouts punched him in the throat so Miller couldn’t talk in the second half. That was the best game Miller ever had.

ME: Well, I have to tell you, I had no idea that things had gotten so bad between you and Dennis.

REST OF THE WORLD: Yeah, I really hate the guy. Hey, listen, I gotta run. I have to make some preparations for when Turkey gets invaded by…

ME: What, Turkey’s going to be invaded? They are supposed to send troops into Iraq.

REST OF THE WORLD: Wooops, I’ve said too much. You take care and I’ll talk to you soon.

Well, the precise total is, of course, unknown, but we do have a pretty good place to start our search. Take a look at the vote totals from yesterdays recall election.

Arianna Huffington, who dropped out of the race last week, got 42,288 votes.

Peter Ueberroth, who dropped out of the race almost before it started, got 21,661 votes.

Gary freaking Coleman got 12,549 votes!

Larry Flynt got 15,155 votes!

Mary Cook, known to most of you as porn star Mary Carey, got 9,855 votes.

And the list goes on and on.

Trek Thunder Kelly, who wrote in the voters guide “Please vote for me, thus breaking the Seventh Seal and incurring Armageddon,” got 1,065 votes.

Lorraine (Abner Zurd) Fontanes, maker of films such as “29 Handjobs” and “Masterpenis Theater”, got 310 votes.

Good Lord folks! There's a difference between throwing your vote away and using it to wipe yourself after a bodily function.

On the 6-22-03 Chris Matthews Show, we got this:

MATTHEWS: I predict Feinstein's the next governor of California and she takes office in November. Check with me later this year.

Gersh Kuntzman has great column on MSNBC that, refreshingly, fingers the media for some culpability in the recall election fiasco. While the column is a great read, it was a quote from one of the myriad fringe candidates for Governor, Ivan Hall, that caught my eye:

“This isn’t a campaign for governor, it’s an audition. Schwarzenegger announced his candidacy on Leno! This thing has been so superficial. But any one of us—OK, most of us—could be governor. I put my pants on the same way as Gray Davis does.”

Hall's thinking illustrates a myth that has taken hold amongst the electorate. That is, that ANYBODY can be a politician. People watch The West Wing, and they think to themselves, "I could be president." Same thing with lawyers. People think that a high school education, some common sense, and constant viewing of The Practice certainly allows them to pontificate on the pros and cons of certain parts of the Constitution despite the fact that they haven't read the document in it's entirety.

Being President, or Senator, or Governor is hard stuff, as I think our new Governor is about to find out, and voters would be better off recognizing that fact.

"If chosen to fill the high office for which you have selected me, I will give to its duties the same energy, the same spirit and the same will that I have given to the performance of all duties wich have devolved upon me heretofore. Whether I shall be able to perform these duties to your entire satisfaction time will determine."
---Ulysses S. Grant, before taking office.

"I know what to do and how to get it done,"
---Arnold Schwarzenegger, before taking office.
Tuesday, October 07, 2003

The Daily Kos is the first to begin the drumbeat for the recall of my Governor. I think this will be a good test of objectivity for the left. After being against recalling Gray Davis, how can Democrats support recalling Arnold Schwarzenegger?

Well, some will find a way, I'm sure, but I shant play along.

Like it or not, and I certainly do not, Arnold legally won. I think it would be much smarter for Democrats to forget about recalling Schwarzenegger and concentrate on making sure both he and President Bush are not re-elected.

I've been on record as opposing Arnold Schwarzenegger winning the recall election long before any allegations concerning his behavior towards women. These allegations didn't affect my thinking at all.

So, leaving politics aside for a moment, maybe you can help me out with this one:

If all of the allegations are true, why is Arnold still walking the planet? Why hasn't an outraged father, or husband, or boyfriend run him over with a mini-van?

Here's a tale that was reported previously in the LA Times (however the link is from The Toronto Star):

Just this week, the Los Angeles Times published an anecdote, as part of a story on Schwarzenegger's early bodybuilding days, about the gubernatorial candidate stealing the girlfriend of a former friend, Don Peters.

He took Peters' girlfriend, a former beauty queen, home, then asked her to call his lawyer to change an appointment.

Schwarzenegger dialled the number, but unbeknownst to the woman, he dialled Peters' number and as the two discovered the ruse, Schwarzenegger shouted into the phone: "I just (had sex with) her, I just (had sex with) her."

Now, I know how big and strong Arnold is, but come on. If you were Don Peters, wouldn't you have waited in the tall weeds for Arnold to turn his back for just a second and then cracked him in the melon with a crowbar or some similar device?

I have a neighbor who is a huge Green Party supporter. He's the only person I know that actually owns a t-shirt that says "Bush And Gore Make Me Want To Ralph", and yes, he is wearing it today. Last week I mentioned to him that I was leaning towards voting for Peter Camejo, and he was so pleased you would have thought he just recieved a strip-o-gram.

Today, I came home from voting and my neighbor seemed to be lurking near my apartment door.

"Did you vote?" he asked.

"Sure did" I answered, dreading his next question.

"Who'd you go with?" he asked.

"You know there is a reason that those booths are private." I said, thinking evasiveness might work.

"Come on." he demanded.

"OK, I went with Bustamante. But it's supposed to be really close and if Arnold got in because of my vote, well I'd feel horrible." I said.

"You betrayed your conscience." he mumbled disgustedly.

"Wait a second, can't my conscience factor in who has a legitimate chance to win and the possibility that I could be throwing away my vote?" I asked.

"No." he said, walking away shaking his head.

Tom Jackson was one hell of a football player. As a linebacker for the Denver Broncos, the three time Pro Bowler delivered more solid hits than Domino's has delivered pizzas. As an announcer on ESPN, Jackson is smart, funny, and articulate.

Tom Jackson is also a hypocrite.

On Sunday's edition of NFL Countdown, an angry Jackson responded to the comments made by Rush Limbaugh that led to Limbaugh's resignation. Jackson made it perfectly clear that Limbaugh was way out of bounds when he made his comments about Donovan McNabb, and Jackson and millions of other people were offended.

One problem: Jackson sat there whilst Rush made the comments and NEVER SAID A WORD about the racial aspect of the comments that now have him in a lather. Jackson (along with Steve Young) did question Limbaugh about the claim that McNabb was 'under-rated', so he was listening and can't claim not to have caught what Rush was saying. How mad can you be when it takes you a week to become outraged?

What I can't seem to get my arms around is this: If you felt that the Dixie Chicks got a bum deal for making a comment about President Bush, why don't the same rules apply to Rush Limbaugh?

It's a sad time for conservatives, as Walter George Peach, known to his followers as Wallly George passed away over the weekend.

For those not familiar with Wally, his talk show The Hot Seat was on for 20 years, and he was the father of actress Rebecca De Mornay.

The Hot Seat was, in a word, hilarious. Wally would have 'liberal' guests on and then would insult and berate them before finally throwing them off the show. Naturally, many of his 'guests' were actually hired to play the part of the liberal.

Consider this nugget from George's biography:

In one well-known incident, a young woman who owned an agency that sent strippers to deliver telegrams appeared on his show; he hurled insults and abuse at her, called her a "prostitute" and a "tramp" and threw her off the show. It later turned out that he had asked for her a date before the show started and she turned him down.

The last few years, whenever I would be flipping around and see The Hot Seat (think 2:30 am on channel 62), I would kind of feel sorry for Wally. It was clear that he just wasn't as quick-witted as he once was, and the only person taking his clown act seriously was him.

Because I don't want to run the risk of being called a 'wuss' by legendary tough-guy Andrew Sullivan, I will gladly publish my voting plans.

I'm voting NO on all of the ballot initiatives.

I'm voting NO on the recall.

Finally, after struggling with this for weeks, I will vote for Cruz Bustamante as the replacement choice. I have been leaning towards Green Party candidate Peter Camejo, but since this thing is so close (maybe), I don't want to risk Arnold taking office because of my vote.

Katie Couric embarrassed herself this morning on The Today Show when she allegedly interviewed former Los Angeles Mayor Richard Riordan. Perhaps Katie was worried about the upcoming segment on her return to The Tonight Show, because when she talked with Riordan all she did was read a set of pre-written questions. There is no indication whatsoever that Couric even heard Riordan's answers as she never clarified or followed up on anything.

At one point, Couric asked Riordan what, specifically, Arnold Schwarzenegger would do as Governor. Riordan answered that Arnold was going to '...redo the fiscal mess, and end the anti-business regulations that is costing California jobs."

Rather than asking if Riordan understood what the word 'specifics' means, Katie was off and running to the next question written in her notebook. Katie, stick to talking to Beyonce or discussing the happenings on Fear Factor, and leave the serious issues to the serious journalists on The Today show.

We get two interesting tidbits concerning South Carolina from the CBS Washington Wrap.

1) The South Carolina Democratic Party is short of cash. So short that state party officials are fishing for a corporate sponsor. While State Party Chairman Joe Erwin assures us that everything will be '...done in good taste,' he will not rule out having the corporate sponsors name ON THE BALLOT.

2) CBS feels that Senator John Edwards' southern stratagy may be paying off as polls show he has opened up a nine point lead over Senator Joe Lieberman and General Wesley Clark. What they don't seem to focus on is that the undecideds in South Carolina total 42 percent. If 42 percent of voters in Edwards' home state are undecided, what does that say about Edwards' ability to win support outside of the south?
Monday, October 06, 2003

Is there any reasonable person that does not think that President Bush KNOWS, or SHOULD KNOW who leaked Valerie Plame's identity?

While Tom Bevan will label me insane, it is inconceivable to me that the President, any President, can not, at any moment, pick up a phone and say "I want to know who leaked that woman's name within 5 minutes."

You know what would happen? The President would have the leaker (and more than likely his resignation) within 5 minutes.

So, either President Bush knows or he has chosen not to demand to know. Either way, his behavior is disgraceful.

Jill Stewart penned a column accusing the LA Times of having an anti-Arnold bias, among other things. In the same column, she refers to Schwarzenegger as " of the hottest beefcakes in the world..."

Are the accusations in Stewart's column true? I have no idea. But when a biased person accuses somebody else of being biased, it really holds little water. It might be the right message, but it's clearly the wrong messenger.

Andrew Sullivan needs only 12 words to show what appears to be desperation from the pro-Arnold types. Here's the post:

WHO'S BEHIND THE SMEAR? Some disturbing details about some of Arnold's enemies.

The link is to a Bill Bradley story in the LA Weekly. So, what does Bradley tell us?

Bradley asserts that Jodie Evans (the only 'enemy' mentioned, making Sullivan's use of the word 'enemies' inoperative) urged one of the women alleging misconduct on the part of Arnold Schwarzenegger to come forward. However, the woman she urged to come forward was one of the three that did so for Saturday's LA Times story, so she was either accuser number 7, number 8, or number 9. Maybe it's just me, but I would think that somebody urging the first accuser to come forward might be 'behind' the 'smear', but when you coming in 7th, 8th, or 9th, not so much.

What evil and nefarious ties does Evans have with the anti-Arnold types? Well, she's a 'former close colleague' of Gray Davis, and her ex-husband gave Davis his first job in politics. Further, she worked as chief fund-raiser and director of administration for the Governor's office.

Admittedly, Evans was a 'former close colleague' of Davis when they both worked in the Governor's office. However, the Governor of that office was Jerry Brown. Can you even remember when Jerry Brown was Governor?

Her ex-husband (by the way, how close are you to your ex-spouse?) did give Davis a job in politics. Of course, it was on the mayoral campaign of Tom Bradley in 1973.

Adding up these details actually 'disturbs' Sullivan.

Basically, we have the pro-Arnold types getting mad about people picking apart his past life, and they answer that by picking apart the past lives of the people who encouraged the accusers to accuse.

And one question still remains: Are the charges true?

Rich Procter, via The Smirking Chimp, gives us a keen insight into President Bush's youth. Warning: Do not drink liquids while reading the story as a sudden jolt of laughter could cause the aforementioned fluid to shoot out of your nose. I speak from experience.

Larry King kills me. This exchange between King and Governor Davis had me howling.

KING: As you look at this yourself, Governor, it has to be a little humbling, right? I mean...

G. DAVIS: You're talking about the recall?

KING: Yes, how you feel.

G. DAVIS: Absolutely.

KING: I mean, what it must do to you.


As Roy Horn lay clinging to life at University Medical Center, the only thing on the mind of the hundreds of well wishers gathered outside was his speedy and healthy recovery.

Well, Bobby Baldwin CEO of Mirage Resorts had something else on his mind.

The bottom line.

With that in mind, Baldwin and other Mirage corporate officers decided to fire the crew and cast from the Siegfried & Roy at The Mirage show. The Mirage said they would TRY to re-hire as many people as they could in different jobs in the company.

I think it's comforting to know that in times of crisis, Baldwin and the other corporate officers had the good sense to keep in mind that their personal bonuses were based on company profits, and without Siegfried & Roy putting asses in the seats, the other people working on the show were simply dead weight.

In a rarity that probably won't become a laugh-line in President Bush's upcoming speeches, the Republican Party has hit the trifecta of scandals, with three of varying degrees popping up recently. Basically, the scandals all involve the same fundamental principal, that being an underling for an elected official did or said something really, really stupid. So, how did each elected official handle things? Let's take a look:

1) Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney

SCANDAL: Romney's press secretary Shawn Feddeman compared the disclosures of Arnold Schwarzenegger's past behavior towards women to rumors concerning Senator Kennedy's behavior towards women.

RESOLUTION: Romney apologized to Kennedy, but refused to reprimand Feddeman.

GRADE-B+. As political cheap-shots go, this was pretty minor. While some called for Feddeman to be summarily dismissed, that seems to be a pretty harsh punishment for an off-the-cuff comment made during an interview.

2) Missouri Senator Christopher "Kit" Bond

SCANDAL: Bond's chief spokesman, Ernie Blazar, started a website named after the tail number of the plane that crashed killing former Gov. Mel Carnahan, his son, Randy Carnahan, and campaign aid Chris Sifford.

RESOLUTION: According to all reports, Bond learned of the website last Wednesday night, and Blazer had been fired by Thursday morning.

GRADE: A+. Senator Bond took a nasty slider over the outside corner of the plate and smacked it right out of the park. Blazer has clearly reserved himself pretty good seats in hell, and people like him have no business in politics. Frankly, I'm not sure if there are any businesses that people like Blazer would have a place in.

3) President George Bush

SCANDAL: Somebody in the White House leaked the identity of a CIA employee, which may or may not be a crime.

RESOLUTION: None. We're coming up on the three month anniversary of the original column by Novak, and yet we really don't know much more that we did then.

GRADE: Incomplete. Who is whispering into the President's ear that ignoring this problem will make it go away? To be perfectly frank, President Bush KNOWS who leaked the information. Why he doesn't just deal with it and fire somebody (even if it's Karl Rove) and move on. Of course, if he does that now, he still comes off bad for not acting sooner.
Sunday, October 05, 2003

Well, for a few days it will be Hector Lopez, and then he will become the dumbest guy in the planet.

Lopez was killed in what can only be described as a bizarre situation. He was in his pick up truck chasing an acquaintance who also happened to be driving a pick up truck. Lopez bumped the other drivers truck three times and then blocked the road to force the other driver, Carlos Jimenez, to stop. Lopez then rushes the other truck and starts beating Jimenez about the face and neck repeatedly. Jimenez then takes off and Lopez grabs on to the truck.

Lopez hangs on for THREE BLOCKS before being killed when the truck hit a tree.

I'll be the first to admit that while I am profoundly against the Recall Election, I am not married to Gray Davis. Like most California voters, I also get that creepy feeling in my bones when I see Governor Davis attempt to give a child a high five, or attempt to get a crowd to chant one of his catch phrases. I mean, we'll find WMD's in Iraq before scientists locate the hidden reserve of Davis' charisma.

So, with that in mind, you can imagine how surprised I was to see Governor Davis interviewed on Channel 4 News Conference on our local NBC affiliate this morning. Davis was alert, attentive, well-reasoned, and not creepy in the least. He even gave a pretty decent explanation (the first one I've heard) of why the car tax was increased.

If the guy interviewed this morning had been around for the last 3 months, this Recall Election would have been signed, sealed, and delivered long ago.

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